Department of Woods Relocation Unisex Jersey Short Sleeve Tee | Where Everyone Just Wants to Be Left Alone
XS / Black
$29.99
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Welcome to the Department of Woods Relocation.
Where Everyone Just Wants to Be Left Alone.
The mission is simple: identify a suitable patch of woods, relocate yourself there, and dramatically reduce your exposure to other people.
No meetings. No traffic. No small talk with strangers. No neighbor stopping by because they “saw you outside.” Just trees, fresh air, questionable cell service, and the deeply underrated pleasure of nobody needing anything from you.
The Department of Woods Relocation is for campers, cabin dwellers, hunters, anglers, hikers, outdoorsy introverts, and anyone who has looked at modern society and thought, You know what? The woods are starting to make a lot of sense.
Wear it camping, hiking, fishing, hunting, around the cabin, on weekend escapes, or during ordinary civilization when you'd simply like everyone to know where you'd rather be.
It also makes a funny gift for outdoor lovers, camping buddies, cabin people, introverts, nature lovers, and anyone whose long-term plan involves fewer neighbors and considerably more trees.
Applications for relocation are currently being accepted.
Human contact after relocation is strongly discouraged.
| XS | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Width, in | 16.50 | 18.00 | 20.00 | 22.00 | 24.00 | 26.00 | 28.00 |
| Length, in | 27.00 | 28.00 | 29.00 | 30.00 | 31.00 | 32.00 | 33.00 |
| Sleeve length, in | 8.60 | 8.90 | 9.20 | 9.50 | 9.70 | 10.00 | 10.40 |
| Size tolerance, in | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |