Welcome to the Department of Weekend Projects.

One Trip to the Hardware Store Is a Myth.

Every project begins the same way.

This shouldn't take long.

Then you discover you bought the wrong size. You're missing one extremely specific screw. The fitting doesn't fit. Something behind the wall absolutely wasn't supposed to look like that, and suddenly you're back in the truck wondering if the same hardware store employee is going to recognize you.

They will.

The Department of Weekend Projects is for DIYers, homeowners, garage tinkerers, reluctant handymen and handywomen, and anyone who has watched a simple Saturday project quietly consume an entire weekend.

The first hardware store trip is for supplies.

The second is for the thing you forgot.

The third is because apparently there are seventeen versions of the thing you forgot.

Anything after that is between you and the Department.

Wear it for garage projects, home renovations, yard work, hardware store runs, DIY disasters, or that supposedly quick repair you started six hours ago and now deeply regret.

It also makes a funny gift for homeowners, DIY enthusiasts, weekend warriors, new homeowners, renovators, and anyone who knows the most important tool for any home improvement project is a vehicle with enough gas to get back to the hardware store.

The Department remains optimistic about your projected completion time.

We'll see you at the hardware store again shortly.